Thursday, April 2, 2009
Area Man Can't Shut the Fuck Up About His New Cell Phone
WASHINGTON TWP, NJ - Local resident Jeff Pickens is now the proud owner of a T-Mobile G1 Android 3G Smartphone, and can't stop telling everyone how great it is. Pickens, 52, suddenly found himself in the market for a new phone this past weekend when his other phone suddenly ceased operating.
After a fight with the asshole at the Clementon, NJ T-Mobile store after the asshole made no attempt to determine what was wrong with the old phone, Pickens, consumed with rage, expelled a string of expletives and walked out of the store. "The guy was such an asshole, I had to get out of there before I did something violent", recalled Pickens, visibly shaken.
Pickens then decided to try another T-Mobile store. "The guy at the Deptford Mall store, Mike, was the exact opposite of the asshole at Clementon", he said. "I really intended to get just a regular phone, but when Mike showed me the G1, and some of the cool things you can do with it, I had to have it. Mike was a great salesman".
Now, Pickens has been singing the praises of the G1 to anyone who will listen, much to the annoyance and embarrassment of his family and friends. "One of the coolest features is 'My Location' on the Maps feature", he gushed. "It shows you exactly where you are by putting a blue dot at your exact location, with mind-blowing accuracy".
"He showed me the map thing" said a family member, who only spoke on condition of anonymity. "He showed me the blue dot, in one room of the house. Then he made me walk over to another room. the dot moved over to the exact spot in the house where we went. I think that's just plain creepy".
Pickens is still exploring the vast array of functionalities and applications available with the G1.
He has yet to make an actual phone call with it.